You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

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A man walked into a bar. He broke his nose.

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Yo momma so stupid when I said drinks are on the house she went and got a ladder

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Roses are red, Violets are blue I suck at poetry, Show me your tits

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

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*knock knock* Who's there? ...Who's there?... *opens door to find a dead baby on the front door step*

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What'sucks and white Jackson

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You shoot at the blonde. Causing her to fall, but I have a feeling she will be pretty mad!

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How do u kill a mocking bird ? Stab it

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Want to hear a joke? Me neither.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? I like Pie. I like Pie who? What do you mean who? Pie isn't a person, it's a thing.

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How do you call a guy with a school bus on his head? Dead. It's highly unlikely that a man would be able to withstand the weight of a massive school bus on his head and survive.

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Yo mama so fat , when she went to the doctors office and stepped on the scale they said please, your weight, not your phone number .

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knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

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Guess What! HI!

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What did Frankenstein say to Dracula? Hey, that's a nice cape.

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Where did the homeless man sleep? A rather nice hotel with fluffy pilloes

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why did the older man give candy to the little kids? he was in a parade

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Do you know what african children do? They die of starvation.

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I am white, asian and black... What am I? A panda

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Q: How do you scream at a purple? A: Black people

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How do you kill a bolonde? You have her/him do an algebra problem.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty eight year olds? They are of the legal age

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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