whats a long boring sotry that no oneever wantsto read? the life of sarah palin.

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why did the white man read the New York Times? because HuffPo is horrible. I mean, it's so so so shitty. it's like a wannabe buzzfeed, which ought to say it all.

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Top Gear USA

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what happens every day? People die

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Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBO... nope bin laden

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why did the boy have to go to the dentist he was hit by a brick

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your mom is so annoying that she has no freinds and lives alone crying every night about how her children abandoned her

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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Q: what happed to the squirrel that lost his nuts? A: it died

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What did the farmer say to the survivor of the plane crash that just crashed on his land? "Need a band-aid?"

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How do you kill a woman? Let her drive

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

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What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

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what do you call a black man driving a police car? a cop

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An old jewish man, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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What's black,white, and red all over? Nothing, because if it is completely covered in red then it can only be red.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. | | + | + + + + Why did the chicken get run over the farmers tractor? Because the chicken crossed the road and didn't look both ways before crossing and didn't see the tractor that ran him over. P.S. The chicken died and the farmer was arrested for animal abuse.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, now so do you.

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A women walks into a kitchen.

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it didn't the hunter shot it

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops