What did the hobo say while giving birth? bob come over here and hold my third leg for me??

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Knock Knock. Who's there? William. William who? You friend...William...you invited me over.. Can I come in?

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What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

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How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

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Chickens want to live in a world where they arent judged for cossing a road ......... K?

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Where did Little Sally go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

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What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

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their were 2 muffins. one said hello how are you. the other screamed "A TALKING MUFFIN"

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What's black and white and red all over? A piece of discarded newspaper previously covering the half dismembered torso of a dead prostitute.

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Pick up lines: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're wearing a university of Tennessee sweatshirt. If I could rearrange the alphabet to put 'U' and 'I' together, I would not do it because I would have to reorganize all of my alphabetized files. Is it hot in here to you or am I experiencing early signs of a stroke?

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Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

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Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

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What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

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why is my phone broken i dropped it

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

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" ding dong " person in side: wait aren't u supposed to knock knock

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Whats hard and long? An erect penile shaft.

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops