Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

what has 2 legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

what did the green grape say to the purple grape? i'm green.

What is red,brown and stinks? A deer that's hit by a car

What's the difference between and Jew and pizza?!?!?! Jews are people and pizza is a food product :D

1.Roses Are Gray, Violets Are Gray. I Am A Dog. Can I Eat Your Leg? 2.What Did The Sandwiches Say To The Grilled Cheese? Nothing. Sandwiches Can't Talk Due to The Lack Of Organs.

I really don't like Holocaust jokes. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off of a guard tower.

What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? A pilot.

Woman's rights

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

Why was the human stronger than the dog? Because the dog had four legs and a mouth and a human has 2 legs, 2 arms, and is taller. Therefore, the human has more capabilites than the dog.

Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Whatever his parents named him

What's the difference between a woman and a car? A woman is merely a useful object, whereas a car deserves love, care, and respect.

Knock knock Who's there? Brittney Spears Brittney Spears who? Knock Knock Who's there? Opps I did it again.

Whats the difference between Steven Hawkin and Gary Glitter? Ones severely disabled and ones a paedophile.

Your momma so fat, she's fat

Why did the chicken cross the road? He crossed the road to get to a podium. He then made a lond speech about how chickens should be able to cross a road with out having their motives questioned.

What do you call a blonde who tries to swim on land? - Stupid.

A homeless man walks into a house He is invited to a lovely lunch and then beaten to death

Q: what the apple say to the orange? A: nothing because there fruits and fruits cant talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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