What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

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Come on, I am trying to cheer you up a bit, honestly how high?

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Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

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Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

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Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

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How do you teach a black guy to swim? You sign him up for swimming lessons.

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Why didn't the giraffe go to the zoo party? He didn't receive an invitation.

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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I now pronounce you man and lion. You may now kiss the pride.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its dopaminergic neurons fired synchronously across the synapses of its caudate nucleus, triggering motor contractions propelling the organism forward, while emitting 'cluck' distress signals, to a goal predetermined by its hippocampal road mappings.

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Why couldn't the white child dunk the basketball? His legs were amputated and he has been confined to a wheelchair.

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A donkey walks into a supermarket and asks the cashier "Where are the potatoes?" The cashier replies "aisle 3" The donkey goes to aisle 3 And there are no potatoes

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How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

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What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

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Roses are 3:18 Violets are 3:18 I Just figured out a pattern. And saved peoples lives with the help of Keifer Sutherland.

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Sometimes an alligator will bring you apples. Sometimes it won't.

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Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

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Why wasn't the man talking? Because he was sleeping.

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why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because it's a free country chickens are free to do as they please

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops