So joe diragi walks out of a gay bar...

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A niggarette

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? ... ... He committed suicide for the simple reason that the soviet and allied forces were closing in on him and he knew that he did not stand a chance of winning the war.

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Where was I born? Pakistan. You?

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Why did Sally fall off the swingset? She had no arms. Knock ,Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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SHE GOT A BIG BOOTY SO I CALL HER by her real name because she is a woman and worthy of my respect.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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a boy fell in mud... a kid took a bath with bubbles... bubbles was the girl next door!

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*Knock Knock* "Who's There?" "Delivery" "Oh right, I just ordered pizza"

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Autism speaks but not really

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Doctor: I got bad news and worse news Patient: Whats the bad news? Doctor: You have 24 hours to live Patient: Whats the worse news? Doctor: Your mom died this morning

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What do you call a praying mantis at your door step? a Jehovah Witness

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Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

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what time is it? 3:16

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Knock Knock Who's There? Dave I don't know a Dave, Please leave.

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What happens when you shoot a giraffe? It dies.

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What is a dead cat on the side of the road. A free cat.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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What was the last thing Batman said to Robin before they got in the Batmobile Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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what happen to covietz when he licked his balls? nothing he likes the taste

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops