What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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A: Who keeps knocking on the wall? B: My neighbors have sex a lot. A: We should knock back.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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What happened to the man who killed his family? Rape.

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What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

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A psychotic man walks into a pharmacy He buys his weekly medication to control his condition.

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Doctor doctor, I came here as quickly as possible, it was just the nearest place I could find. My dog he... he's panting and bleeding and I don't know what to do I think he's dying and I just want him to hold on... Please... Well then go to a vet you stupid shit.

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What do you call a deaf, blind socialist? Helen Keller.

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

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What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

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After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

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What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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How did the magician make his assistant disappear? He killed her and then cremated her body

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Roses are red, violets are red, everything's red... Retinal haemorrhage.

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Q: Why was the baby crying? A: I kicked it.

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Wanna hear a bathroom joke? YOU TRYIN' TO KILL US?!?

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That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

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bees knees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops