Jacob loves stroking his gf's doodle every lunch break. He was embarrased cause it was bigger than his.

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Mr Jones, we're sending you to a mental health clinic

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How do you drown a blond? Keep her head underwater until her lungs fill with water and her bodily functions stop working.

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When Kylie and Conner have a baby he will have a centimeter Schmeter!

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why was tommy so sad?............because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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What is funnier than 24? 25! hahahahahaha!

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How do you get a kid to shut up? You ducttape his mouth,legs, and arms and throw him in a pit

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How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

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Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

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I love you. You love me. I killed you're family. No you're an orphan.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride a bicycle? Because Timmy was a goldfish

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whats one plus one penis

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the little pink lady joke: There once was a little pink lady who lived in a little pink house. One day, she was in her little pink bed when her little pink doorbell rang. So she gets out of her little pink bed, puts on her little pink slippers, crosses her little pink room, openes her little pink door, goes down her little pink hallway, goes down her little pink stairs, and to her little pink door. She openes her little pink door, and there is a postman standing on her little pink mat. The postman says: "Does Mr Green live here?" The little pink lady said: "No." So she closes her little pink door, goes back up her little pink staircase, down her little pink corridor, into her little pink room, takes off her little pink slippers and hops into her little pink bed. Then her little pink doorbell rings again. So she gets out of her little pink bed, puts on her little pink slippers, crosses her little pink room, openes her little pink door, goes down her little pink hallway, goes down her little pink stairs, and to her little pink door. She openes her little pink door, and there is a postman standing on her little pink mat. The postman says: "Does Mr White live here?" The little pink lady said: "No." So she closes her little pink door, goes back up her little pink staircase, down her little pink corridor, into her little pink room, takes off her little pink slippers and hops into her little pink bed. And then her little pink doorbell rings again. So she gets out of her little pink bed, puts on her little pink slippers, crosses her little pink room, openes her little pink door, goes down her little pink hallway, goes down her little pink stairs, and to her little pink door. She openes her little pink door, and there is a postman standing on her little pink mat. The postman says: "Does Mr Brown live here?" The little pink lady said: "No." So she closes her little pink door, goes back up her little pink staircase, down her little pink corridor, into her little pink room, takes off her little pink slippers and hops into her little pink bed. Finally, its breakfast time, so the little pink lady gets out of her little pink bed, puts on her little pink slippers, goes out of her little pink room and to her little pink kitchen. Inside, there are 3 men. 2 are eating cheerios, 1 is eating an apple. This proves that cheerios are more popular than apples!

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Trashcan!

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

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Why did my pussy get wet? Because I splashed him with water. LOL SO FUNNY OMFG DA BEST JOKE EVA!!

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Q) What's worse than getting dumped by text? A) Getting hit by a fridge.

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Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

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how do you decrease the unemployment figures? abolish lidle, aldi, and netto

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why did the chicken cross the street? he couldn't, he lives in a rural area on a farm where there are no streets

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Friends are like potatoes, If you eat them, they will die.

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What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

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full house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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