My mom is such a bitch that no one will date her!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRUE STORY!! :D

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What's red, green, and goes about 200 mph A fire hidrent I lied about the green and the 200 mph

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Billy: hey dave, wanna hear a joke? Dave: what? Billy: oh yeah, you are deaf.

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Why did the boy get hit by the ice cream truck? The driver of the ice cream truck was drunk

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Why was the black man forced off of the roller coaster He had heart disease

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What is brown and has 15 legs? (They answer "What?") Reply: I don't know I was hoping you would.

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Everyone was standing in a bank happily Three muslims walk in Everyone continues their everyday lives coz we live in a non racist society and nothing could go wrong Then the building blew up

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The grass is always greener on the side that uses manure and fertilizer daily.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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I was looking out the window on a Sunday morning. The coffee was fresh, and the air was moist. I had recieved a phone call last night on the contents of a briefcase that was to be left on my front door today. The explination was vague, and I was told to enjoy my last day. Then I died.

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i drive all the time its no big deal open the door and get behind the wheel

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the girl crossed a road to shoot a black van. she shot the sherrif.

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Why did twenty mexicans run down a hill? There was a marathon in the area.

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A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

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What's fat and ginger? My dog.

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A baby seal walks into a club

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A guy walks into a bar, A metal one, OUCH!

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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How do u know a black woman is pregnant? When she pulls out a tampon it has no cotton on it.

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

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An Asian Man Has His Eyes Wide Open

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Q: what happed to the squirrel that lost his nuts? A: it died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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