Religion.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

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Q: How do you make scrach paper? A: Take a paper and scrach it.

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"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

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Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

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Two generals went for a trip, it went very well in general.

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You're flying over a lake in your canoe and the wheels fall off. How many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? None! because ice-Cream doesn't have legs!

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Q: What do you call Justin Bieber with a penis? A: Darn good plastic surgery.

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Always put punctuation at the end of your sentence

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Blonds are cute and so are u.

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a potato flew around my room

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http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

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What does Santa Claus keep in his gardening shed? Nothing. Santa Claus isn't real.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? a lot.

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A Elephant was going to fight against the biggest and toughest and meanest giant African desert mouse! The battle the animal kingdom had waited for centuries! *DING!* Elephant: Get up Mickey! Mouse: Squish! Disney: How big do you really think a African "giant" desert mouse is?

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What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

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John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

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What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

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You know what's funny? Clowns.

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Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

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Why didn't the giraffe go to the zoo party? He didn't receive an invitation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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