what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

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John and Henk are walking down the street. John kills a man, the cops are coming and John runs away. Why didn't Henk ran away? Henk was a rock

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What did Winnie the Pooh say to Eeyore? Nothing, he just suffocated him in a pot of honey.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are simple-minded creatures and perhaps there was some source of food on the other side.

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Why do we bother living when someday we will die? To reproduce and watch TV.

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an 0rgy.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

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Instead of throwing out his garbage, a young boy decided to play a prank on some passersby and left a banana peel on the sidewalk. moments later an elderly woman walked past and slipped on the banana, falling backwards and smashing her head. The young man watched from the bushes as paramedics shook their heads and placed a now lifeless body in a body bag and took it away. The young boy, startled and shocked at what he just saw, tried to run away, but slipped on his own banana peel, falling backwards onto the pavement. The young boy was lucky and survived, but later had to go to therapy for many years to come, the thought of his prank gone wrong torturing him until he took his own life. What is the moral of the story? Do not litter, ALWAYS throw out your garbage.

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Q: What's wrong with being gay A: Nothing is wrong with anybody because we're all human

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What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

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A man walks into a bar. He recieves a concussion and dies of internal bleeding 3 hours later.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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._____________________. Whale!

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...IIITS... :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW ITS :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW! :) YAY! :(SHADDAP YUUU! Episode one... The waiting for the wait!

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canada

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of 5

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Somewhere in prison- Germany 1940 Janurary, Tuesday, 630PM: "Why doya' think you're so innocent" "It was only a jew!"

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you wanna hear a funny joke? so do I

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What is similar between a penguin and a newspaper? If you kill a penguin, then grind it up into a fine powder, then the penguin becomes a newspaper.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ, your lord and savior.

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How did the girl get her Mardi Gras beads? She purchased them at a reasonable price from a party store.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops