whats a cross between michael jackson and arnold shwarzanegga? Michaelwasanigga

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why did the plane crash the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did the Pitchfork say to the Gremlin? Nothing, because its a pitchfork, and gremlin's don't exist.

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Your mother's so fat that affects her self esteem.

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Do you know what african children do? They die of starvation.

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What do flowers and people have in common? They both die.

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(approach girl) How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to fit into the same dress as you

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What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

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Neither have I

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What did the tomato say to the ketchup? Nothing both vegetables and condiments are inanimate objects, therefore cannot speak

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What do you say to a friend when they're feeling down? The Game

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Whats funnier than 24? 25

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On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

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-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

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Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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After thinking hard for a very long time, the pig realized he was a fat, worthless piece of shit.

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yo momma's so dumb she attended a dyslexic test and was proven mildly autistic.

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want to hear a cheesy joke? ... cheddar

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty eight year olds? They are of the legal age

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Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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