If Oscar Meyer had a dog, what breed would it be? A golden retriever.

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What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Docter Docter who? Yes its me, Craig Who your docter, I have the test results back Im afriad its positive,you've only got a few months left

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What is the best way to kill Kony? Shoot him in the head.

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Why did Justin Beiber fall out of a plane? Because i pushed him off

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I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

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why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Banana you glad I didn't say 'Orange?'"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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whats two naked people in a bed? too much information

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ask me if i'm a tree are you a tree? No.

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A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

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hi

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What has feet but cannot walk? What has a beak but cannot peck? What has wings but cannot fly? A dead bird.

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sally was hit by a bus and lost both arms knock knock who's there? not sally

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What is yellow and corny? Corn.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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What's the main difference between an angry white man and an angry black man? The angry black man is probably of African descent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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