Why won't lance Armstrong survive 2012 Because he has cancer

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

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Q: What happened to the dead baby? A: It was Buried

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what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Pizza's don't scream when there in then oven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it doesn't matter because he got hit by a bus before he could even make it.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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I wonder if God looks at the Earth all these years later and thinks, Man, I really went overboard with the water, didn't I?

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What starts with F and ends in U C K? firetruck What starts with P and ends in O R N? popcorn What only costs 5 cents on weekends? your mom

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo To whom is Boo?

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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A retarded man speaks jibberish, because he is retarded

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How many jews can you fit into a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and a thousand in the ash tray.

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What did the fish say when it hit the big stone wall? DAM

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Two blondes walk into a building......you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

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what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

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Before Super Mario existed what did people play? Instruments.

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Knock Knock (No response) Knock knock (No response)

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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What made the lady dance? Bandz!

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I leave you with a riddle, I am round. I am an orange. What am I?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops