A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

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Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

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A man walks into a bar.

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Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

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jimmy carr walks into a tax office.

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what do you call a Ukrainian who eats pirogi's A walking stereotype

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

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Why did Chad find dead people all over the playground? Ask him, it's not like he's pointing a gun at your face.

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Q:What did the scissors say to the paper? A: Nothing, cause thier scissors and paper they don't talk..

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Kncok Whose there? Not Sally

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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look in the sky! its a bird, its a plane........ Its Miles

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Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies: 'Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.'

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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Hey, so I know this guy who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy's cousin who's name is Mark.

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What do you get when you mix red and blue? Gang violence.

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How did a baby get across the street? Stapled to a chicken.

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Two blondes were driving down the road. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. So the blonde looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

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Why does beyonce sing "to the left to the left?" cause women have no rights

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why was the kid sad? his fish died. he had to flush it down the toilet.

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Your mumma is so stupid her IQ is 40.

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What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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