Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

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Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

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what did steven hawking say to the prostitute? Nothing, he is unable to speak, he needs help from his word speaker thing.

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What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

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Samraj.

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

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AIDS

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

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What did the banker say to the other banker? We're both bankers!

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar... Bartender: "hey we have a drink named after you!" Grasshopper: "What, Kevin?"

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how many dead babies fit in a bathtub 16

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their were 2 muffins. one said hello how are you. the other screamed "A TALKING MUFFIN"

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin.

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why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? there are no roads in factory farms.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Now heres a boy who can't read. Ngjmhgmgk? MTGKMJHGMjhkmjh(hgjnhgfjhgfj nj nvj vj kvnmg ifh) njki nj jo ncj kgjkfngjfk jkn jkgfngkfn gkn kgfnigkfnmg km kgf kglfn kglf kglgkflnm klnm mklm khlgfpnkmfklnmlk mbk lm klgfnmk gfmkngfnkgfklfknm m k kf mkfl m k gflmgkffmkopfdjtorper srhes hngfdlj;sdnht rktrtnr rdpkng ngngf.

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A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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