What did the farmer say when he lost his cow? Where's my wife?

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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What's worse than getting a divorce? Nuclear warfare

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Did u hear bout the guy who went to the donut shop yeah he has brown hair

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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A hispanic lesbian couple accidentally walk into a country western themed bar. And leave immediately as a bar is no place for their 2 year old son.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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No one walks into a bar... because it was closed.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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ugh good riddance

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What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

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"why did the cheese not go to church on sunday" "because it was jewish"

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

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how do you make time fly? throw a clock out a window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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