What is the quickest way to a mans heart? Through his chest with a stick.

what do you call a kid without arms and legs? Freak

A plane crashed in the border of mexico and USA. Where do you bury the survivors? tell me in the thing bellow

Do you want to know a funny joke Answer- Kieran Reynolds HAHAHAHAHA This is not Daniel Lesiak

You know what's catchy? A cold

Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Autism speaks but not really

Yo momma so fat, she has hypertension, diabetes, and a higher risk of heart disease.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

knock knock get lost!

I really want to wear my Christmas leggings Actually I lied about the leggings, they're tights I love anal

a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

Q: What's the worst part of 3 Mexicans dying in a car accident? A: They were my friends.

c:

Why did the chicken cross the road? To commit suicide thus getting to the other side(hell/heaven)

Hey i just met u And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met u

Whats green and has 4 wheels? A green car.

What do you call a man with a shovel through his head? Unless he was carrying ID when he died; John Doe.

Why did the Indian homosexual shoot his dog? Because it was old

Why is Adam saying numbers? He is a maths teacher.

http://richardfigures.com/

One out of every 3 smokers dies.................. the rest gain immortality.

They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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