Who is the fiercist Raptor of them all? Matt Daly

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Woman's rights

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I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

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Q: what did the dad get for playing baseball with his son? A: a line drive to his balls

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How do you stop a vehicle moving at high speeds? Apply the brakes in a reasonable fashion.

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What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

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Black People.

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Why didn't Johnny walk to school this week? He was dead.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue The mothership came and your did a whole lot of scam

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Where did the people go after the bomb went off? EVERYWHERE!!!

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realising the apple is the worm...

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A: What's worse than two dead babies lying on cement? B: The Holocaust? A: Yeah or something like that

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Wanna hear a joke? Justin bieber

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Two weeks ago, my brother walked into a flea market and asked if they sold fleas. He's so silly.

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What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

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"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

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what's blue and goes blub blub? a blue blub blub

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A homeless man walks into a house He is invited to a lovely lunch and then beaten to death

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was pursuing his dream of becoming the world's best circus clown, which six developed a fear of in a tragic circus accident which occured in his childhood. Therefore, six was afraid of seven.

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are simple-minded creatures and perhaps there was some source of food on the other side.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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What do you call a woman with no arms or legs that fell off a boat fucked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops