why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Cancer

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What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

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knock knock who's there me me who? me me me me who? me me me me me me who? and the more the joke continues the less funny and more annoying it gets

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why did the boy fall off his bike? someone threw a fridge at him

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God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

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How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

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What do you call a man in Afghanistan? Either a scuicide bomber a soldier or a tep

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Why did the blonde get a good occupation? Because she had a great education in a private school.

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knock knock whos there knock knock whos there knock knock whos there poor billy didnt know that the knocking was just a tree branch and he stayed asking the same question for 21 years

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just two, but I'd like to know how they got in there.

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Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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Why are all of the cars in the left lane? Because you are in Winona MN.

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What do you get when you cross a hippo with a dishwasher? 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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yo mama is so fat that wii fit puts her in the overweight category

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a horse is running across a cliff at 54 miles per hour, against the wind. he has been running for three hours. he needs to run for 347 more kilometers before he is tired. the wind is blowing at a speed of 10 miles per hour... he wonders if he will make it when suddenly he falls off the cliff. why did he fall of the cliff? it was a retarded horse.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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How many jews does it take to stop hitler. no one knows they didn't

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A pregnant woman walked into a bar what did she say? Can i have a drink

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your girlfriend is so dumb she is clinically retareded

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I have aids

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How did the child cross the road? He couldn't his legs had been lost in an awful car accident that had killed his whole family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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