When life gives you lemons....you probably just FOUND lemons...

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Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

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Why did the black man begin to cry when his friend aimed a gun at a watermelon? Because if he were to shoot it would be a waste of perfectly good food.

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A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Go home, look for the ingredients on which to make proper, delicious lemonade. Afterward, I would go in the front yard, make a stand, then make a sign that says $1.00 lemonade. Then you know make millions on your master-mind plan that no one else ever thought of.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue At least that's what I've been told But honestly I've never seen those flowers so I wouldn't know.

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

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charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

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What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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<=3 penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops