Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to end the lives of two male individuals and paralyze the the third male individual from the hip down.

How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

hey

What did the mute say to his friend? Nothing.

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

HURT

Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

Yo mama is an upstanding member of her community.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

So you are "The Nero" are you not? How ironic... ...I got nothing on you, let me ask you however, why did you quit the underground society? What changed your lifestyle so much? I mean I accept that you did not do it out of fear or cowardice, but why did you leave it up to the rest of us to try to hold together the last remains of freedom and social information? What? To use your techniques in order to entrance people into buying your books? How is that so different? I am not saying that I consider your methods lesser, because nobody here does, but if you can explain how this makes you better, I would appreciate it, I am certain that most people would.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window, at the 122th floor of a skyskraper.

What do you call a man with a towel on his head? A good target.

What do a book and a tractor have in common? Both are for driving, except the book.

knock knock. who's there? Alticka Alticka who? Alticka pudding cup.

Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

What did the lady find out when she went to the doctor. She had breast cancer.

What do you get when you cross a black man and a mule. Arrested.

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut? A Heart Attack.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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