A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance addiction, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life and was apalled by his bad decisions.

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If this joke were a potato I would be very confused

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Hey Jay, did you here the one about the 3 hookers at the bar? Jay didn't reply because he was deaf

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What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becasue he wanted to. also he didnt want to be involved in the holocost

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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Three guys at the beach decided to bet on who could swim the farthest. The first guy, could not swim so he lost. The second guy got a cramp right away. The third one swam far away into the distance, and was not seen or heard on for days... Three weeks later his corpse was found floating by the shore. The other two died out of guilt.

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i have to pee out my ass.

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If I had a dollar for every time i got distracted, I want some ice cream

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A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

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A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

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Why did the jew give all his money away to charity? -No I'm kidding, he didn't.

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Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

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A horse walks into a bar, realizes that he shouldnt be here so he walks out.

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What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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A guy walks into a restaurant.... He ordered his meal , got desert and left a nice tip based off a percentage of his final bill.

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What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off the cliff? ........………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………..................................................................... .

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You wanna hear something dirty? A pile of garbage. That's dirty.

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whats brown and sticky? a sweaty mexican

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasnt wearing a seat belt.

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A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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