What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus !

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Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

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Did you hear about the 4'10" psychic that escaped from prison? It's on the news! "Small Medium At Large."

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I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

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A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

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What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

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Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

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What do you say to two cows? Hey cows.

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Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

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http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

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You make me believe in myself, after all, it takes one to know one, I just wonder what I am, what are you?

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? -because she had no arms Why didn't she get back up? -because she had no legs Why diddn't anyone help her? -because she was black.

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What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

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What did the jobless man get for Christmas? Fired...

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Bushes are Red, Trees are Red... my garden is on fire...

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You know what's funny? Clowns.

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did u here bout the guy who found 500 dollars on the ground? yup he is 500 dollars richer

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Q. Whats Brow and rhymes with Snoop? A Dr. Dre

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Why doesn't Michael J. Fox drive a stick shift? He was raised in an urban area and was only taught to maneuver with vehicles that shifted automatically.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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