How many Jews can you fit in a car? I don't know it really depends on the car, usually about 2 in the front, 3 in the back and... That's about it

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

Knock Knock. -Who's there ? It's me. -Come in.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

There are two monkeys sittingn a bathtub. The first one says, "Scratch my back Mack." The second one says, "That's okay Joe I've got a radio of my own." (laugh like you think it is funny)

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

women's rights.

What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

whats yellow? lots of things.

What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

A possesed goat: "moo"

Why couldn't the Asian drive? He was blind

What did Santa Clause say to Rudolf? Nothing. Santa's not real.

Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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