What did the explorer say to the new species Oh look it says squirtle let's call it squirtle Oh look it say woof let's call it poochyena

A plane full of atheists, with one Christian, crashes into a field over Ohio. Everybody but the Christian dies upon impact. Amazed, a news reporter on the scene of the crash, asks the man, "How did you suvive this tragic event?" "I had a parachute." Responds the man.

Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

Do you like your life? No. OK.

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? Zero, they already stole them all.

Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

The Sentence Below Is True The Sentence Above Is False

Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

why did the boy named rylie white get aids Because he had unprotected sex with someone with aids.

What do you call a blind man on a jet ski? Dead.

What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

why was the woman afraid of her bestfriend he raped her

Women's rights

how did they guy with no legs in the wheel chair walk? he couldnt because he had no legs.

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

How did Jimmy know that his neighbor was a serial killer? He didn't... Jimmy's dead now

Friends are like snowflakes, they go away when you pee on them.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. who's driving? The black guy because he just turned 16. His school mate the Mexican child is still only 15 and he will have to wait a few more months before he can drive.

What did the black kid get for his birthday? Yo bike!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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