'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

"knock knock" "Come in"

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was wandering because he was lost and got hit by a car in the process.

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

What would be worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts.

Jesus was a good guy

Life is like a box of chocolates! It sucks if you have diabetes

Whats the same about Jerry Seinfeld and Adam Sandler They are both comedians

Q: Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: She had no arms... Q: Knock Knock! Q: Who's there? A: NOT SARA! --- Q: Okay... What song does Sara sing to her arms? A: Somebody That I Used To Know... --- Now. If you're happy and you know it clap your... nevermind O_O

A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

What did the Dragonfly say to the Mosquito? Nothing. He ate it.

Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

How did the man die? He was killed alive.

How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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