What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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What did one Chinese man say to the other? ?????

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom's a whore.

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If an illegal immigrant fought a child molester, is it Alien vs. Predator?

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Knock! Knock! Who's There? The Police. Open the damn door. Nobody Is Home.

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The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

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What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

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What do you call a man in Afghanistan? Either a scuicide bomber a soldier or a tep

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why harry potter, if he was a wizard?

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knock knock who's there who who who and if u say something about an I will punch u in the face u stupid cike!!!!

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ronald wants to join a gym, they tell him to lose 20 pounds before coming back or else.....

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A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

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Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

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One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

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What's that in the road.... a-head?

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You are walking down the street, and a man keeps on getting in your way. You want to politely... Screw it already and stab him in the back

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What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

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what did the man say to his boss? Hello boss

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What did the "gangster" looking black guy ask the white guy he approached randomly on the street? "Excuse me sir, are you aware of the injustices done toward the jewish community that has been the decline of western society since the reclamation proclamation?"

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Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

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your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is dead, and thereby lacks the necessary motor control.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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