knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

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How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

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why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

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What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

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Stephen Hawkings viewed porn as a child

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life is a barrel of tomatoes...unless you paint them blue.

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" ding dong " person in side: wait aren't u supposed to knock knock

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What's better then petting a lion? Petting a lion and not getting eaten

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Harry Chappell raped someone

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What did the farmer say when he lost his coat? Where's my coat.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

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how many dead babies fit in a bathtub 16

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What did the banker say to the other banker? We're both bankers!

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How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

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Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

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What happened when the Asain woman got in her car? A speeding drunk driver hit her and now she is paralyzed from the neck down.. Its a tragic story

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I STUCK MY TESTICLE IN A BLENDER!!!

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a woman leaves the kitchen.......

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How do you change you dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

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What do you get when you mix red and blue? Gang violence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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