Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

How do you kill a ninja? Shoot it.

u jelly?

did you know, that a Bear has 42 teeth? massive erection.

Why was the pig sweating? It wasnt, because pigs have adapted by using behavioral thermoregulation, which is the act of cooling themselves in the mud or water.

At least I dont have AIDS.

What did God say when he saw the first black man? What a wonderful creation I have made.

Knock knock Who's there? Your brother My brother who? The dead guy over there.

Why did the moogle cross the road? Kupo kupo kupopo!

Knock Knock Who's there? Your landlord. Get the hell out.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

whats worse than one week in school? two weeks in school. whats worse than two weeks in school? three weeks in school whats worse than three weeks in school? child abuse, killing animals and murder

What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense Microwave

Little girl and a pedofile walk into the woods at night. Little girl says, "mr pedofile im scared" pedofile responds " you think your scared? i have to walk out of here alone."

How can you tell when a African man is lying? Like any other person you would use a lie detector.

Misner is a twat.

How many times can the Frenchman cheat on his wife? I don't know.

If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

What's black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, mixed-race babies.

whats green andthrows forks at you? a blonde painted green in a bush wih a gun and a fly on her eye

What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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