What's red but smells like blue paint? Red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

what do obama and terrorist have in common -they are both human

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Yo Mama So Fat ... She Look Like Dis ///(*<>*)\\\ | | | | <=> <=>

thumb_up thumb_down -39

So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

thumb_up thumb_down -39

what did the palatiespussy say to the asain how many cocaines did i say was a black pankakkkke MMMFUUCCK NORDSTRUM(CUM)

thumb_up thumb_down -41

why didn't the blond laugh at the anti-joke? because, she was aborted in her mom's third trimester

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

thumb_up thumb_down -43

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Do you like fish-sticks? Love 'em. You like putting fish-sticks in your mouth? Yeah. What are you, a gay fish?

thumb_up thumb_down -45

my gave me a game i said thank you

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

Your mom is so fat, that when she went to the doctor, the doctor told her she had Type II Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

What is worse then finding a worm in your apple!? Getting raped!

thumb_up thumb_down +54

I died shortly after writing this.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What is small and gives people courage? Certain kinds of illegal drugs

thumb_up thumb_down +50

How many people with Alzheimers does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Knock Knock Who's there? Your real father. I left you when you were a month old and I have regretted the decision ever since. I would like to be a part of your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

knock knock hold on im takin a poop!

thumb_up thumb_down +44

There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Your mom is so fat that when she went to the Doctors, He said she was slightly over weight

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops