Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't rape, which her sister had experienced while traveling in 2007.

A black man comes home from work.

What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer..... Just Kidding! He got a bike!

What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

Do you play piano? No

knock knock whos there the game _______I LOST THE GAME_______

How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

you know whats not funny? the Holocaust

Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...