Why didn't the monkey cross the road? He saw the chicken get run over.

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Did u hear what happened to that man with no arms and no legs who tried to play water polo? No, what happened He drowned....

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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My favorite word starts with F and ends with U-C-K! My favorite word is FIRETRUCK! What'd you think I'd say? My favorite thing starts with P and ends with O-R-N! My favorite thing is POPCORN! What'd you think I'd say?

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Why do blacks run away from whites? Because god told all people to never go to the light.

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3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Stop shitting in my garden

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bish bash bosh giz a nosh

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Two blondes were driving down the road. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. So the blonde looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

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What do you call a black mailman? By his name.

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What did the dog say to the cat? I don't know actually

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What did the Ginger get for Christmas? A: a soul

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What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

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What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

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69

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How many Ethiopian's can you fit in a bathtub? As many as you want, they'd all fall down the drain. JimBoto

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A guy walks into a bar and orders 4 shots. The bartender promptly pulls out a gun and shoots him 4 times.

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Let me tell you this really funny Dane Cook joke.

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What's worse than the holocost? 6 Million Jews

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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Vagina.

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I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

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What's black and doesn't work? My Blackberry, but luckily it was still under guarantee and the situation was solved swiftly and relatively drama free.

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which one is easiest

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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