What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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Hey Jay, did you here the one about the 3 hookers at the bar? Jay didn't reply because he was deaf

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why was the spoiled girl running from her parents? because they weren't her parents, they were kidnappers and were going to sell her into underground sex trafficking markets where she would probably spend the rest of her life being a slave.

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What do you call two dog? dogs

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What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say orange? Well you shouldn't be. I came to tell you your family died in a car crash and you have AIDS.

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If you peel my skin off, I won't cry, but you will. What am I? A human being with a high pain threshold.

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Ahem. Testicles. That is all.

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What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

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what happens when I bought a car. A man stole it from me and killed my family.

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What happened to the teacher? He taught his students.

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Q. What do you call cheese that's not yours? A. Stolen, you're under arrest.

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

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Win industrial estate, Newry

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Gullible is not in the dictionary Yes it is

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeline McCan

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause kade touches himself at night

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Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I lost The Game, You just did too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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