A horse walked into a bar and ordered a drink. It was nothing out of the ordinary because the Everett-Wheeler interpretation of quantum mechanics is correct and he lived in a parallel universe in which the roles of humans and horses are reversed.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whos the biggest oaf................................ coasta

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you do when a black man points a gun at your face? you do what he tells you to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Went to a zoo there was a asian shouting GOOZILLA at the reptile house I said no 2 frickly pickles please He said helwo I'm wo pong th pow wice to weet you I said does he come with subtitles Old priest said no the said hello little boy want a mint I said oh thanks I'm not a boy I'm 19 Old priest said no no you can't have one of my special mints I said wait those mints have R's on them are the rainbow mints Old priest no there raspberry I said ok don't be a stranger Old priest said oh I will I said wait your THE PRIEST He said oh I'm just a priest looking for little boys I said no your dead now jumped 30 feet in the air sat on a bird dove into him bird went threw him we made a team promised to clean the world of evil only to find out that we killed the mother of all priest Bird said tweak tweak I said yeah let's hunt them all down Shall the be a part 2 you decide

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The queen is killed on sunday there are three suspects the cheif the princess and the butler The princess' said she was getting lunch The cheif said he was making lunch The butler said je was getting the mail So who did it A: the butler they dont diliever mail on sunday

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? One is a specific type of sports car, and the other is a sad destruction of many young lives

thumb_up thumb_down -1

meh

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what has 2 legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worst then finding drugs under you brothers bed finding your dead cat under his bed whats worst then finding your dead cat under your brothers bed finding your dead Gran whats even worst then that the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -1

lets have sex, ok, but itll have to be anal, cuz im a guy xoxox danni

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q) What do you call a black man swinging from a tree? A) A very silly man as it is potentially dangerous

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's black and flies? Whatever it is, it's not a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did your mom say after she went sky diving? Nothing, her parachute didn't open

thumb_up thumb_down -1

if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Once upon a time, The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If you see a fat man, what do you say to him? Hopefully nothing mean, seeing as that would be demoralizing to the fat man.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why won't lance Armstrong survive 2012 Because he has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

hi will

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops