Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How Do You Fart Eat Beans

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, WITHOUT MY HEART I CANNOT LOVE YOU

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

The sentence at the bottom is true. The sentence at the top is false.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When life gives you lemons you have lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A person expresses their opinion online. Another person thanks them for sharing their opinion but kindly disagrees, then he wishes the other person to have a good day.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is something you would not normally find in a china cabinet? Japan

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Christopher Reeves walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock, Knock Who's there ? So So who? No, So Lee

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A muslim, a jew, and a black man walk into a bar, the bartender asks what they would like to drink, after respnding, paying and receiving their drinks, they sit down to drink them. What a lovely scene of ethnic diversity

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An asian man and his friend walk into a bar. They both order a few drinks and drink them responsibly. They then pay for their drinks, and drive home to their loving families.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, violets are red, everything's red... Retinal haemorrhage.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops