What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

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Guess What! HI!

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Whats 9 + 10? 19.

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Q:What do you say to an albino man that will always get his attention? A:His name.

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road? Because they are extinct and roads did not exist when they were alive.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind, deaf, and dead.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Jim came home from work. only to find out his family had been murdered

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a white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy all jump off a building. they all immediately die on impact, later on the news white guy jumps off building.

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knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Not the Twin Towers.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom's a whore.

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Guess what. I eat weed and smoke yogurt

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THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME

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So this beautiful woman goes to see her doctor and says "Doctor i think i have a fever." the doctor replies "I think I've got just what you need. open your mouth." The woman opened her mouth and the doctor gave her some Advil "This should help your fever. that will be $300." in shock the woman said "these prices are to high."

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holly shit!!!! when did i get on the internet !?

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God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

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Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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PISS OUT MY ASS!!!!!

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What did the man say to the waiter when he was about to tip him? I'm not gay, but $20 is $20.

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Your chicken just went across the road. What does this tell you about the economy?

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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