Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

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Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: Cus 7 had AIDS and it was bleeding all over the place!

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What can eat, sleep, and reproduce? Not a rock, that's for sure.

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Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

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Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

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How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

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What did paul say to bill? "Hi, I'm Paul"

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

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http://richardfigures.com/

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

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One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

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You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

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Your mom.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Roses are red Violets are blue God makes things beautiful... What happened to you

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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squirrels playing in the street=dez bryant playing tennis

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Yo mama is so so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

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knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops