How do you teach a black guy to swim? You sign him up for swimming lessons.

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How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

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Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because it's a free country chickens are free to do as they please

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't it's a dead baby!

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What did the daddy hamster say to the baby hamster? Nothing. Male hamsters eat their young.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Roses are pink. Violets are pink. The brony just took a dump. Don't give me that shit!

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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A horse walks into a barn.

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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Knock Knock *opens the door*

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Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

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Why are their so many lesbians? cause they LOVE the pussy.. (Tastes soo wet and tight)

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A man says to a woman, "hey, bitch, shut your fucking mouth you goddamn hooker." Most hookers are used to it.

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"Knock Knock," "Whos There?" "The Pizza Guy" "I hate pizza."

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The banana, the raspberry and the pear arrived to the party, then the carrot and the tomato arrived as well, but when the apple and the orange arrived the banana left... ...This where just getting to fruity...

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Why was the black man pulled over? Racism still lingers in today's society.

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I hate all races.. Especially the 400 meter sprint

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Nero, please cut the bull, I know you work for the feds, you are involved with the FBI, I know, but its not my problem, I just do not like you lying to me.

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At least I dont have AIDS.

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Why do girls have bumps around their nipples ? -it's brai for suck here .

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Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

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Yeah, I never intended to keep that a secret. What is autocast?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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