Today's Horoscope for Cancer: You have Cancer.

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Why did the kid get out of school at twelve? He left early with a stomach ache

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Violets are blue, Roses are red, I like to mix up my poems.

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Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

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Q: You know what you should add to your recipe? A: No, not really. Tell me. Q: What? Are you expecting an answer now? Why don't you just shoot me, huh?! Pee on my clothes and set them on fire! You racist son of an **orange**.... It certainly tastes better with oranges.

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why did Rebecca black get down on Fridays? because she had school every other day of the week.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

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What's brown and sticky? The british econonic system from 2 May 1997 to 27 June 2007.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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roses are red violets are blue you might think i can write poems but, bit i really really can't

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A neutron walks into a bar. He orders a drink and ponders why his mother gave him the name, "A neutron."

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why did the women have to black eyes? obviously because her husband hit her because he wanted a sandwich and he slapped the bitch and told her to get in the kitchen!

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Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

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If a woman was born in China, raised in France and got married and died in New Orleans, what is she? Dead.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To be continued.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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roses are red violets are blue im colorblind how about you

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why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

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whats black and red all over? a chalk board

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68

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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