What is black, white, red and blue? ..... A cow dressed as superman.

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Q: Whats the difference between nude pics and your mom? A: I can wackk off to nude pics

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How do you make a little boy get off a swing? You are an adult and perhaps it is inappropriate for you to be on a swing, especially when it is already occupied by a child of the right age.

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what's the black mans shirt made out of? cotton

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why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

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A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

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Nyan cat had pancakes for breakfast.

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Why did the black man get pulled over by a cop? He was driving 12 miles over the speed limit.

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whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

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What did the homeless man do with his trolley full of aluminium cans, He took them to the scrapyard and sold them as this is his only source of income right now

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Why did the little boy cry? I cut off his toes one by one and shoved fireworks up his ass

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One kid says I've had threw bottles of water and I haven't had to go to the bathroom. His friend says may have a urinary tract infection.

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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Justin Beiber

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1.Roses Are Gray, Violets Are Gray. I Am A Dog. Can I Eat Your Leg? 2.What Did The Sandwiches Say To The Grilled Cheese? Nothing. Sandwiches Can't Talk Due to The Lack Of Organs.

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I really don't like Holocaust jokes. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off of a guard tower.

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Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, your entire family has died in a terrible car accident.

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Who is the fiercist Raptor of them all? Matt Daly

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Why did the fish swim away from the boat when the fishermen put him back in the water? Because he obviously wasn't gonna get back in the boat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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