what is worse than a pile of dead babies? there is one alive at the bottom. what is worse than that? it eats its way out.

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what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

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How did the boy die in the holocaust? Cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he clearly has an owner that doesn't fence him in.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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How do you fit four gays on a barstool? You turn it upside down

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Congress back then: No sooner had I ended this prayer than a pederast farted on my right. "Hah! a good omen," said I, and prostrated myself; then I burst open the door by a vigorous push with my arse, and, opening my mouth to the utmost, shouted, "Senators, I wanted you to be the first to hear the good news; since the war broke out, I have never seen anchovies at a lower price!"

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Zombies eat brains! (You're safe)

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lol a man is drowning

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What do you call a black man on your front porch? -Racism is a serious and non humorous problem.

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

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a man in a black van pulls up to a kids house and offers him icecream the kid points out that since it is summer and black absorbs heat, that the icecream will have melted

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A giant meteor will hit the earth tomorrow.What do you do? Tell everyone I told you so.

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What's more fun than thumbing down a shit joke? Thumbing down a shit joke which is neutral previous to your disliking giving it a little negative number.

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What time is it? Refrigerator

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Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

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Knock Knock Come in. Thanks.

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What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

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what did the bee do when bill tried to slap it it stung bill and died.

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what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

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why harry potter, if he was a wizard?

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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