Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

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If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

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roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

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How do you make a tissue dance? Blow a little boogie in it!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and get hit by a car.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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whats worse then getting fired from your job? Getting raped by a giant gorilla with a 4 foot long penis following by being bitten by a very poisonous rattle snake and slowly dying a painful death.

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Trashcan!

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why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

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How many Jews fit in an oven? Nein

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

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Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

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Why couldn't the kid eat candy? He had diabetes, so he could put himself in danger and possibly result in death which would leave the family torn apart and all committing suicide in a matter of 10 years.

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Girl : What's a anti joke ? Boy : it's you .

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A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

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Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

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Where's my baby??

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What do you get when you cross a muslim and a mexican? i don't know, i just thought that this would make an interesting question.

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Romans rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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