Why did the black guy get hit by a train? I strapped him to the tracks

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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i have to pee out my ass.

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why didnt the man go to the wedding? he wasnt invited.

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how do u kill a black kid ..... stabb him in the face with a nife

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

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Q:what has four legs, is green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A:a pool table

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A Black and a Mexican are in the back of a car, they are carpooling to save money on gas.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

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The person below me is weird.

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Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

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Q. Why is Italy shaped like a boot? A. Do you think they could fit all that shit in a tennis shoe?

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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Q. Why did the boy get so fat? A. From playing Pokemon Pearl Edition

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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why was ej's penis hard? because he had just got done having fine exquisit sex which he had ejaculated with a sturn body builder name frank who he had been seeing for the past few months.

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What's big and white?

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Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares i dying from cancer

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How do you know that you tv has been stolen? It's no longer there.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why did the girl fall down the stairs? She has no legs, that's why.

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what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops