Harry Styles

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What did the guy say to the blonde? "You're a blonde."

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What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

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how do you beat the system? throw your xbox out a window.

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Why was the Mexican smart? Because he was very well educated and went to college, and got a Ph.D

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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your momma so dumb she put a battery up her but and said i got the power!!!

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You idiot.

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Knock Knock [Opens Door]

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doctor,doctor my eyesight is getting worse, you are certainly right, this is the post office

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why does Chuck Norris never get wet in the rain? Because he has a very serviceable umbrella

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Fucked thinking zero out of sub level -1 I hate Black Mexican Jews Born in China! But that does not make me a racist! I insist I am not a racist, there exists only two of them and they are both assholes... ...Or is that racist? :S NeroMetal: The ONLY Moralman aka the most pointless man in history not the "leader of Neronist whatever fuck I raped and killed that Faqq0t murderer, no fucking "Church Of Nero" There is no code embedded here... ...Or is that racist?:S

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An apple up your ass, a penis in your ramen, finding out you have herpes, or many other scenarios. In short, there are many things worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

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A man climbs up a tree. Once he reaches the top he is scared and thus incapable of getting down.

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What did the duck wear to go swimming? A bathingsuit!

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Abortion

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If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

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OMG this actually works! 1. Hold your breath for 5 minutes 2. Die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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