What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

What's white, black and can't fit through a man hole? A nun with a spear in their head

why did the kid get in trouble. Because he put this up in typing class -charles hall aka chuckles

What's brown and sticky? The british econonic system from 2 May 1997 to 27 June 2007.

What did the bat say to the human? Nothing because bats make too high of frequency noises for humans to understand

I don't know what was a bigger disappointment, the series finale of "Lost" or--sorry I thought I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

brock has small hands for a small job

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

What's brown and sticky? A Stick

Why did the Billy flunk the test? His parents were killed in a refridgerator

roses are red leather is black when when god made you he was smoking crack

Knock knock Whos there You spelt who's incorrectly You spelt whos incorrectly who ...................

Why did the book disappear?

How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

Why was the African Americanfemale at an abortion clinic? Because she just killed a child.

What do a fish and a moose have in common? They both live under water, apart from the moose.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Sperm enters their vagina and fertilizes an egg cell causing a child to be conceived.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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