Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the women leave the kitchen? She didn't, women belong in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If you see a pink banana, you are color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I Won a Math Debate................ say it fast unless your blind then dont say it wait you cant read it so uhhm Alaska

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Johnny walked up to his teacher one day and asked her to explain to him how babies were made. She instead whispered back to him, "Let me show you". He declined, because he wasn't prepared to be a father.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what's blue and goes blub blub? a blue blub blub

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Asian eat rice? Because its food

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats long and stretchy? elastic

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Dylan is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do you think when you see someone throw a man with no arms and legs into the ocean? chances of survival are minimal

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock, knock Who's there? Not your dead Nan

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Bill:What do you get when you cross a panda and an eagle? Joe:I don't know what? Bill: Is that even possible?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why didn't paul ride the horse? he was busy

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is green and looks like Grass? A painting of grass

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A:I like your shoelaces!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops