A guy walks into the bar and orders a coke with some ice and some peanuts. It cost a total of $4.00 plus tax. He gave the bartender $5.00 and told him to keep the change. He drank the soda pop and burped loudly and left the bar and forgot his peanuts.

kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

Why is the sky blue? As the light from our Sun shines into the atmosphere, most of the colors are able to reach the Earth’s surface uninterrupted. However, because blue light has a wavelength that is the same size as the particulates in the air, this light is scattered in every direction. This blue light bounces from particulate to particulate until it eventually reaches your eyes. For this reason, no matter what direction you look in the sky, it appears to be blue. This blue light originated with the Sun, was bounced around in the sky many times, and then eventually reached your eyes.

today a nazi canadian killed himself the world is now a better place

A married couple is arguing over the temperature in their house. The wife wants it at 62 degrees and the husband wants it at 74. What should they do? Nothing while they are arguing their daughter decides to put it at 32 and freeze them to death

Paper shield.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

LIFE INSERT COIN TO BEGIN!!! SELECT DIFFICULTY EASY

a blond girl walks into a bar

My friend told me to jump right off a cliff That's impossible since this cliff goes left...

Pokemon go: Team mystic

How do you make a bull angry? Light it on fire

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

Q: Who`s the badly treated kid at school who always faces punishment, but is inadvertently provided with recompense every single day (s)he attends class A: The poeple who fall into the category that does not encompass the people who are treated with dignity at school and never experience punishment there, but always receive some kind of reward for trying to succeed anyways.

What is the difference between a motorcycle and a football? 42, because ice cream has no bones.

why did the fat guy become fat ...COD..

Jesus steps out of a boat, and walks across the water to shore. He's such a show of. Only an attention whore would leave a boat and walk across water for no good reason.

Why did the black guy cross the street? Because his master ordered him to

from south park what do u call a jew on a rope no one ever said the answer, so my answer is a jew on a rope.

Why does Santa Clause not have children? Because he only "comes" once a year

What did casino dealer say to the other? Every day I'm shuffling.

what do you do when you see a black guy with half a face. call an ambulance because hes most likely in serious pain

how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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