roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

What's green and has four wheels? A dolphin. I lied about it having four wheels. I lied about it being green. I lied about the whole thing.

A straight A star quarterback in his senior year of high school was about to throw the game winning pass in his season's last game and complete the school's undefeated record when he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? The doctor prescribes him tablets to treat his bi-polar tendencies.

What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

What do you call a bunch of black guys on mars? a problem What do you call 1 million black guys on mars? a bigger problem What do you call all the black guys on mars? a solution

Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

my eyes hurt from what? being open too much

While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

Why was the black man escorted from the bar? Because the bartender was racist.

Kim Kardashian got a job.

Why was Jimmy upset? There is a frog taped to his face.

A plane crashed in the border of mexico and USA. Where do you bury the survivors? tell me in the thing bellow

I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

Sigh... You know life, you start all optimistic and "I am going to be wealthy mommy and stuff" Then you know, life turns not quite out like you planned it, and, well, you wish you had made some other choices you know what I mean... Your grades where not that good, that girl you really loved did not like you back, you know what I mean right? ...Well I don't, how is it like?

Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

What do you call a black man that flies a plane? -A pilot

When the tsunami hit in 2004, christians worldwide prayed for the victims. it didnt help

President Donald Trump

Knock knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Orange Orange who? Banana Banana who? I have AIDS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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