Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

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What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

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If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

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why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

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A man is approached by a mysterious character in the streets, offering to tell him a dark and amazing tale. The man declines and walks away.

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WUT SMELLS ? my poo

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What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

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a black man and his girlfriend are in a car, who is driving? the cop

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Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

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dfasdf sdf ds fds fds f sdf s fs

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What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

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Yo Mama so slow She can't run very fast.

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A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

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Why can't a Tyrannosaurus-Rex clap? It's Dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a dick you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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