What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

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i was driving home after work but i had to stop because an old lady wanted to cross the road..... the old lady was abused by her father as a child, and had Alzheimer's

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was scary.. made by Kevin Kool

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Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

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Who took the last can of soda? I dunno.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you!

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

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What do you call a man who has Alzheimer's? Wait what am I doing?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

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The town was so small. The ferris wheel was green.

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In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

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Knock Knock Whos there Who Yan Who Yan Who Chow Yan Chow

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"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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What starts with "m" and rhymes with monkey? Platypus

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A man is in the desert and he finds a lamp, he rubs the lamp and out comes a genie! The genie says "I can grant your three wishes, for releasing me from the lamp" The man says "I wish I didn't have AIDS".

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why was the man's arm bleeding? Because he just got shot in the arm...

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Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

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whats small and tickles? pubic lice

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What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

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why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

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How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

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Why was the fat guy sad? his daughter is slowly dying of anorexia why was the fat guy sad? his daughter was raped by a giant panda bear

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Q: What happened when Johnny cheated on his test? A: He got a higher score

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops