What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Hit by a bus Why did the bus driver drop his coffee? He hit the boy

thumb_up thumb_down +6

this is not an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why can't Brent speak at the moment? Because he is eating his ice-cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you cross a black man and a mule. Arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut? A Heart Attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, Violets are unicorns, This s h i t doesn't make sense, Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the lady find out when she went to the doctor. She had breast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a man reads his wife a poem "roses are red, violets are blue, and I love you." the wife talks to her brother asking why he changed the poem he said men do that cause they love you. later that night she got pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Why can't Eric drive a car? A: Because Eric is a rock

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Hey, why are asians yellow and africans brown? I'm colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Where did little Suzie go during the bombing? A:Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mom's so old she sometimes uses outdated racial slurs loudly in public. It can get pretty embarrassing.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red Here's something new Violets are violet NOT F**KING BLUE

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Justin Bieber's Never Say Never 3D came out the other day. I went to see it, and it was a pretty good movie.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops