A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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How do you know if a black man was in your house while you weren't home? When you let them enter to babysit your children.

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whats uglyand cry , and screams mommy ... you after i bitch slap you

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why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

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How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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They should introduce a filtering system on here. That way any repeated jokes, or idiots taking up a page with a copy and paste routine, could be simply erased by those who are bored with them or find them irritating. [L]

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your going to die

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What's the difference between a pen and a tiger? Believe it or not they are both not a cantaloupe.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had herpes.

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your life

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Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he has a serious anger problem.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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What did the mexican fireman call his twin sons? nothing. they were stillborn

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A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

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A Christian asks God why there is so much pain and suffering in the world. Everyone around him moves away from the grown man talking to his imaginary friend.

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Q. What roles did girls play in the Gold Rush of 1849? A. Miners.

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what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Pizza's don't scream when there in then oven.

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What did the midget say to the leprechaun? Nothing.....midgets don't usually converse with leprechauns....and leprechauns aren't real.

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What's the same about a crouton and a pencil case? Both are used for dirty things, such as shoe tying.

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how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

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What is the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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